Nevermind the fact that he looks like he lost his virginity to a Hulk Hogan body pillow. I just wanna know why he went for The Baltimore Handshake when another $20 would have gotten him fast-lane access to clam city.
LIFE LESSON #237: If someone uses the word negotiable in their Craigslist ad - move the fuck on to the next one or prepare to doomsday prep on Valtrex & Clorox bleach. Discounts are temporary. War-torn genitals arent.
Bitch looks like Velma Dinkly crossbred with a piece of asparagus and has deflated whoopie cushions for tits to boot - how does life get any worse? Becomming a communal sex toy for the YMCA. That's how. Parts 2-6