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Porn Scenes Worthy of an Oscar 5

Volume #5 in a collection of videos that Charlie Sheen would be ashamed to attach his name to. And without even a single appearance from a graduate of the Woodman School of Rectology, that's saying something.

Uncle Dick-Dont-Fit

Sonuva bitch... dude's packing the kind of penis that can only be described as "an emergency every time I have to take a piss". Time to call up AARP and find out what size wheelbarrow they're willing to cover for this kind of disability. Something in a dual-wheel polycarbon should do it.

Creating the Perfect Woman

There's just no forgetting you did something like this. Their throats will be forever agaped. The chronic oral queefing has already set in. They're essentially walking, talking whoopie cushions and yet... they remain in good spirits. I like dat in a partner.

"Dad Gave Me Salmonella"

For fuck sakes, there's only 2 things capable of further emasculating a man that is fantasy-banging his meth head daughter. One is knowing you stuck your dick into a family classic, the other is whatever the shit is going on here.

06/15/18 WTF

Lobster Versus Girl

If the 1980's taught me something, it's that ANYthing goes as long as there's a killer soundtrack behind you. Except this. Not even the renaissance of crack will be held liable for this shit.

11/02/17 Vintage

Fake Stripper High On Pharmaceuticals

Babbles the pornstar takes too much of something before ruining a scene where she plays a patron fucking stripper. Also featuring an awkward dude and his borderline gay friend as "the stripper fuckers".

09/19/16 Spizoo Strippers

Backstage @ Lesbian Bukkake!

Behind the scenes of a classy title like "Lesbian Bukkake #8" is something like you could never imagine. Ever wonder what it's like behind the scenes? Probably not, but sometimes these thots fail in epic fashion and it's hilarious.

09/07/15 LULZ

This Guy Told Me To Go Fuck Myself

I think this could be the downtrodden, meth-addicted little brother of the Reading Rainbow guy. They call him Black Salami and he's going to show us things.

05/30/14 WTF

Buffalo Billy's Bath Salt Adventure

Only so many things could explain such a bizarre video. I assume the lead male or the director was on drugs, but most likely everyone on set had to be on something.

05/23/14 Bizarre

Luckiest Guy at the Strip Club

In the bowels of Brazil a.k.a. the other other Mexico, a local stripper gives a drunk and weary traveler an experience he'll never forget... if he can remember. He goes home with a dildo souvenir so he'll definitely know something went down that night. #YOLO

05/08/14 Public

The Adorablest Camwhore

This girl will either steal your heart like it originally belonged to her anyway or annoy you into destroying something beautiful. For me it was her strong beliefs on pokemon and those back dimples that melted my cold heart.

10/25/13 Blazefyre Camwhores

My Vagina Is On FUCKING Fire

Webcam models manage to overload a vibrator to the point of catastrophic electrical failure. Who would have thought masturbating with something connected to a 120 volt wall outlet could be dangerous?

08/26/13 MyFreeCams Fail

It's Only Smellz

Never have I seen a man do something so incredibly vile with such charm. Where there's tension, he provides laughter. Where there's pain, he provides comfort. And where there's feces on the tip of his penis... he provides dinner.

12/19/12 LULZ

Turtling While 69'ing LOLOLOL

Pug-faced Hispanic drinks herself so numb she doesn't even notice when last night's chimichanga is hanging halfway out her asshole. Her laugh is as bad as her hygiene. Sounds like something Steven Urkel would emit while making love to the dude from Wonder Years. Watch this one all the way through.

02/02/12 Fail

Pornstar Loses Her Shit

Ariana Jollee gets a tad bit emo on the set of Neo Pornographia 2 after receiving a bitchslap 'one million times harder' that what she was expecting. This quote sums it up pretty well: "this is sex, this isnt fucking beating people". I think she's on to something here.

07/05/11 Fail

Sniffing Her Butt Wont Help

Premature ejaculation is funny. People trying to combat premature ejaculation is funnier. Notable examples: A) pipe squeezer and B) focusing on dog shit. Today we introduce a new, equally fucking retarded method for countering early evac. It's called sniffin your costars asshole. And unless the bitch just shit out 4 baconators, it wont work.

05/16/11 Premature

Pulsating Pussy

Asian chick gets the elasticity fucked out of her, generating one pussy-throbbing orgasm after another. I have to say, the end result isnt too aesthetically pleasing. After the 5th orgasm her twat starts to look like something off an Arby's value menu.

12/08/10 Orgasms
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