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The Worst Cumshot Of All Time

This dude ejaculates Grey Poupon. Straight up. It's the most bedazzling shit I've seen since that picture of Jesus appearing on a dog's asshole. Be sure to keep a towel handy in case you vomit and/or nut.

3,362,991 views 03/06/12 LULZ

10 Men - My Agent Said Only 2!

Sativa Rose nearly shits bricks Quepapas after realizing she's been duped into doing a quasi-bukkake. Haven't seen a Mexican get this fiesty since the time i got caught sniffing second-hand chones at the local swapmeet, wearing nothing but jesus sandals.

2,182,729 views 11/16/11 LULZ

Cum Dodger FAIL

Hungarian broad tries to bail on the wrong cocksmith - Steve Holmes. Dodge one load, no problem. He can work up another wad of creme brulee instantly. That's right, zro downtime. Watch this motherfucker work his magic.

3,287,009 views 09/19/11 Fail

Jerk Deliberately Cums In Her Ear

Missy Monroe cooks up a nonstop bitchfest after getting blasted in the ear by a bukkake boy. But the bad mood doesnt last. Come the 2 minute mark, she's more concerned with bragging to the camera about the small fortune she just got paid for swallowing the seed of 50+ degenerates. I'm filled with envy.

2,451,257 views 06/18/11 American Bukkake Fail

Porn Noob Pwns Himself

Big fat curved penis sends a fresh wad of home cooked Twinky filling right back into the face of it's creator. It's not a problem I expect to incur any time soon but I do retain faith in the bottle of Extenze my sister so kindly purchased me last xmas. Similar videos HERE & HERE.

2,828,911 views 04/19/11 Fail

Hey Mikey, She HATES It

Curly Sue gets an afternoon snack - one hefty load of farm-fresh cock custard blasted directly into the esophagus, compliments of the house. Let's just say she's less than appreciative.

2,651,584 views 02/23/11 Gag Factor LULZ

The Art Of Male Stripping

No more vids for a few days. This shit took all week to edit and now I've got a date with my neighbors cleaning lady. She's 18, dont hate. Already got advance tickets to Harry Potter 7. IMAX. Ultimate panty dropper.

2,842,510 views 11/18/10 Strippers

Bad Aim

German dude gets blasted in the face by a fat wad of his own man sauce and nearly pukes all over himself. I guess this kinda invalidates that saying "everyone loves their own brand" haha.

2,862,228 views 10/30/10 Fail

He Cums Battery Acid

This is classic. The last ho-bag in this comp literally goes from gagging on a load of rancid jizz to asking for tips on what to steal at the local Pepboys. Apparently the Purple Power degreaser she jacked last week isnt the hot ticket item she thought it out to be.

2,434,192 views 10/24/10 Black Vagina Finder LULZ

She Hates Gangbangs

I bet you 5 bucks and the remainder of my turkey pot pie that this bitch had no clue she'd be fucking Benjamin Franklin (visible at the 4 second mark) & Doogie Howser (1.24 mark) when she volunteered to do a 300 man gangbang. You can literally see the regret in her eyes from start to finish. CLASSIC.

4,029,921 views 07/28/10 LULZ

She HATES Blowjobs LOL

When you weigh as much as the couch you're nesting on... performing fellatio is practically considered "exercise". Naturally she's not a fan. What's special though is her mock enthusiasm right at the end. You can literally see calories being burned as she imitates the standard pornstar approach to sucking dick. It's mesmerizing.

2,225,848 views 06/27/10 LULZ

I No Longer Hate Clowns

I was really expecting this chick to have one of those inconspicuous, slit-like vaginas.... not a corned beef gash [as depicted in picture #2]. Still hot as fuck though. She just needs to lay down some Crest Whitening Strips on that labia minora and she be aight. SOURCE: Lexi Belle

3,591,334 views 06/08/10 Gallery

Husband Of The Year

I haven't seen such misogynistic greatness since "He Hates Hookers" with the late Douglas DeMann. I dunno. There's just something infinitely amusing about women being repeatedly verbally degraded by trailer trash king pimps.

3,898,531 views 06/06/10 LULZ

Friendly Fire

Dude gets blasted with man chowder after standing in the line of fire like a dumb shit rookie. Even worse, most of the load landed right in his belly button. Gonna have a real fun time cleaning that one out buddy!

2,715,118 views 05/30/10 Fail

NO ME GUSTA JIZZUM!

I don't know what's funnier: the fact that a professional cocksmith accidentally blew his load in the middle of a lap dance or the chunky bitch's facial expression after getting blasted with man sauce. Both are most definitely Kodak moments.

2,960,447 views 05/16/10 Dancing Bear Strippers

The Most Miserable Pornstar Ever

Pretty sure I once saw this chick in a humanitarian commercial for Yugoslavian orphans. It's hard to forget a facial expression like that.... especially after fappin to it for 3 consecutive months.

2,251,514 views 10/07/09 Fail

Pornstar Hates Semen

No one said you had to like it baby. Just sit back, open wide and think about all the Baja Chalupas you'll be able to buy as soon as you're done. That's what gets me through the day.

1,518,928 views 08/17/09 Cum Haters

Blowjob Fail

It's semen, not battery acid. Embrace the saltiness and show some appreciation.

2,153,988 views 07/21/09 LULZ

Don't Cum On Me Motherfucker

I wonder what that must feel like... to defend yourself from a physical assault as you're in the middle of ejaculating. I'd sue the bitch - 50k in punitive damages for an orgasm ruined. No one fucks up my fap session and gets away with it for free.

2,496,798 views 05/08/09 Fail

The Dumbest Sex Device Ever Built

That doesn't even look too fun. Her tits look like tomatoes on the verge of exploding. I never realized breasts were so durable. Not only do they come in handy for whatever the fuck you'd call this shit, but they also serve as excellent punching bags. They're multipurpose, unlike my penis.

1,495,633 views 12/28/08 Bizarre
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