The Future of Fucking

Xanex Rookie Humiliates Herself

First impressions are important. Unless of course your name is Kandi Baby and have access to more pharmaceuticals than Liver King. Whoever thought it was a good idea to release this pornographic lobotomy probably saw The Marvels on opening day too.

I Want HIV

A "scared straight" look into a small portion of the gay community that has fetishized and even glamorized HIV/AIDS. [Documentary]

The Absurdity of Japanese Pornography 1

A "last man standing" circle jerk to the death with tranny power rangers from outer space. After decades of being forced to censor genitals, Japanese smut producers have lost their minds.

The Caught Compilation 4

Admittedly these are all pretty standard 'i drank 2 entire Coronas on spring break and had sex with a house plant' plot lines... but dude in the last clip has some explaining to do. Like, this is why I have to wear diapers at 27-years-old kind of explaining.

The 49 Year Old Virgin

Meet Allen. At almost 50 years old, he's never had sex and is on the verge of losing all hope. Now it's up to a $400 goth hooker with a heart of gold to help him lose his virginity once and for all... or will he fuck it all up?

Energy Drinks and Alien Sex

A caffeine addicted, amateur paranormal scientist returns home after an experiment to make contact with beings outside of earth has presumably failed.

Stacked and More Socially Awkward 18-year-old

You clicked the original one so many damn times, I had to dive deeper into her discography. Unfortunately it turns out all her roads lead to this evolutionary cul-de-sac using her as the only form of exercise he's seen since Jock Jams was a thing. Don't look that up. [-PART I-]

101 Asian Stripper Tricks

Welcome to the far east, a place where vaginas are never shaved but always multi purpose. A place where a nice business man can get a sake and light a cigar off a strippers vagina. Fun times.

Asian vs. Airsoft

Some wisdom I picked up during my 2 hour stakeout of a monster truck rally bathroom: You get what you pay for. And by the looks of those potato-sized welts taking up residence next to her shithole, I'd say this dude used Groupon at the time of service.

How to Survive a Gangbang

The downside of crossbreeding compassion with an industry that considers rectal depth as a measuring stick for paycheck tiers? Every dude within the city boundaries will be socializing your cornhole like it's Chinese healthcare. edit: I decided to see what Sativa was up to nowadays... and... well... I was not disappointed

85 Pound Nerd Masturbates @ Work

This girl is ridiculously cute. I want to hold her hand. I want to smell her hair. I want a 3x5 inch cut-out of the computer chair fabric that was blessed with her vaginal discharge. Until then, this gem will have to do.

SHUT UP AND FUCK MY FRIEND!