Awkward Moments in Porn 15

THAT DIDN'T END WELL

The World's Most Offensive Fetishes

Pretty much the most perplexing acts of genital manipulation I've witnessed since marathoning all 47 volumes of SSBBW Ivy and Friends Videos. My voice matters today more than ever before.

Awkward Moments in Porn 14

Flattery was never my strong point... and it still isn't. Half the decisions here look like they were made by a person that smokes wet Newports, and yet everyone is chowin down like it's grandma's old fashion applesauce. Your fellow Walmartians will be hearing about this.

Awkward Moments In Porn 16

There's a lot to digest here. But nothing is as concerning as whatever rodeo clown, double-wide uncle sister bullshit is going on around the 3:11 mark. Axe body wash isn't going to clean this feeling off me tonight. Time to dip into the disaster emergency kit.

Stacked and Socially Awkward 18-year-old

Admittedly the carb walrus she's costarring with may have her beat in the embarrassment department, but she's not far behind in this race. If anything at all for offsetting what may be the greatest set of natural tits ever documented by having the face of Jaden Smith. It can not be unseen.

Family of the Year

"She's beautiful!", announces mom in the voice of an angel while watching her daughter masturbate. Then dad comes home, see's mom and daughter naked in the tub on web cam. Shocker: he's totally cool with it.

Porn's Biggest Losers

Little engines that just fucking couldn't. If there was a "Special Olympics" for sexual performance, these guys would still be the underdogs of the league. The other retards would prolly bully them.

The Future of Horse Fucking

Why are we still here? Just to suffer?

BiG Bertha's Pocket Rocket

The name "Big Bertha" comes from a giant Pre-Nazi German war cannon that would lob 1,800 lb explosive shells into shit like France and Belgium. It also happens to look like this bitches dick.

"Say The N-Word Or Suck My Dick"

The "South Floridian's Guide To Dating Your Cousin" or Kylie Island dropping that new fetish DLC? You're probably waiting out the future aftermath videos from her now. The kind that can also be achieved by renting a John Deer tractor and filling her with Oxycontin. But where's the chivalry in that?

Depth Defying Moments

The 4:30 mark will be the breaking point for some of you. Is it real? Will you ever look at BFG Division the same again? Did I free throw one into the sink at Starbucks from the foul line because their stall was locked off this morning? All these questions have the same answer.

Stacked and More Socially Awkward 18-year-old

You clicked the original one so many damn times, I had to dive deeper into her discography. Unfortunately it turns out all her roads lead to this evolutionary cul-de-sac using her as the only form of exercise he's seen since Jock Jams was a thing. Don't look that up. [-PART I-]