Fangirl shits pinecones after overhearing pornstar Brian Pumper refer to her as a 'bitch'. Blows are exchanged & shit gets ugly, but the real battle is all verbal, with ego-busting insults like "u think i wud tweet about u? I FUCK MOOLIONAIRES NIGGUH". Fucking brutal.
Remember the frigid chick that randomly started sobbing in the middle of a Rocco shoot? It was actually pretty touching, to both my heart & my penis. But apparently that encounter was only chapter 1 in a saga of piss-poor decisions.
A dozen volumes and all we can learn is a two-pack of Coors Light gives the confidence one needs to perform like a deranged circus animal. But today? That education is free. Practice what you see here and I promise them size 14 Bumble girls will never "lmao" at you again. More: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-] [-7-] [-8-] [-9-] [-10-] [-11-]
Hot chicks + social anxiety. It's a phenomenal combination, second only to Mr. Pibb w/ Koala Yummies. Add a degree of sexual inexperience into the mix and you got yourself GF material, provided that they don't first end up in porn like this tard.
Is it even possible to bring an oriental female to orgasm without the help of Bob Vila's signature series at this point? I don't know what evolutionary timeline they're living in over there, I can promise you this road only leads to an addiction to Newport cigarettes and a whole lot of apologies.
A socially inept goober gets a job getting jerked off by a hottie and manages to fuck it up, dashing his dreams of porn stardom in the process. It's like the movie Rudy, if Rudy was thrown out the game before ever playing and never scored.
Two semesters spent shotgunning Bud Light and using the sink as a toilet? No problemo. Thirty five seconds of experienced squabblenecking? Not a fucking chance. Ladies and gentlegenders - I present to you face of higher education.
Unlucky Spanish chick gets bashed in the butthole - full force, no lube! Prepare yourself. The level of agony herein is second only to Adele handcuffed to a stair-master.
This girl might as well be the Napoleon Dynamite of fetish videos. (read: perfection). Doesn't even need to be penetrated. Just watching life flash before her eyes in between each fault line cracking was enough to keep my Fruit of the Looms soggy.
