Don't Try this At Home

No, seriously don't. Every once in a while pornography life overlaps into real life lessons. Let's just be glad this learning experience was made possible without the assistance of Czechoslovakian accents, and a petting zoo.

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See that pretty face? Well, that's all you get because she's too busy getting seizure-fucked in the face by a cock raging french guy the entire clip to look at the camera. #rekt

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These porn producers, always so preoccupied with if they could, but never stopping to wonder if they should. I can't even imagine how awkward this scene must of been to film for everyone involved.

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Unacceptable Devices VIII

idk what the fuck is going on in that last clip. But if that isn't the body type of a woman that's muttered the words 'i used dijon mustard as lubricant while losing my virginity to a neighbor's pontiac fiero' at Festivus dinner, idk what is. Now apologize to the laws of thermal dynamics.

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You're laughing? This 18 year old needs more performance enhancing drugs than Mr. Olympia's gold medalist, and you're laughing?

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If you think one Dutch girl's journey to turn her rectal cavity into affordable housing is where this type of content ends, you would be right. I wish you were right. And that last clip proves you should have been right. I recommend nothing you're about to witness.

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These overseas full force fuck fantasies videos are starting to get a little disturbing to be honest. And like one of the greatest voices of our generation once taught us: you never go full force. More questionable bean flicking material HERE.

The Return Of 'Gentle Breakdown' Girl

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