Some "feels" I'm glad I will never experience in life: pap smears, digesting $20 worth of Del Taco and the Simon Cowell of deep throating porn demanding I GO DEEPER. There's just no coming back from something like this.
Much like Adele after mistakenly ingesting a reduced fat potato chip, you can quite literally see fear in this girl's eyes. Emphasis @ 10.40 mark with the commencement of non-lubricated, deer-in-headlights anal. More HERE.
There's a very thin line between making love and balls-deep cornholio slaughterage. Where that line lies, I do no know, but I can sure as fuck tell you this greasy Estonian faggot sure as fuck crossed it.
The novelty of having a 10 inch cock sure does fade quick when the head of your penis looks like a Platypus LOL. Rotate your dick 90 degrees and run it over with your Monte Carlo. You'll be aight. Video from ANAL IN THE AMAZON.
So what's the scientific reasoning behind this one? Either her twat has Parkinson's or this is Hollow Man 3 and that mischievous fuck Kevin Bacon is back with a silenced Hitachi magic wand. Think about it. Full video available on POV PERVERT.
Meet your new idol. He's got more visible STD's than a Compton crackwhore and still manages to pull bitches with ease. This particular skank is a prime example. She sucks his cock as if those warts are Summer fresh blueberries. GAG.
I cant even imagine how many jackoff sessions came to a halt after this saggy-assed dinosaur stepped in front of the camera. How the fuck are you supposed to beat off when 50% of the screen is devoted to the puckering balloon knot of a gay porn veteran? Honestly...
All I can think about is the people who jack off to this shit. I envision a crowd of a thousand Japs in a dimly lit adult theater, simultaneously ejaculating just as the girl's vagina gets blown into oblivion by a point-blank blast from a 12 guage. Enthusiastic high fives, everywhere.
Great news folks! Getting fucked by their horse's 18 inch cock is no longer a prerequisite for new applicants. The only requirement now is just a meager fellatio session with one of their five dogs. Hell of an opportunity!
Poor fella. First his cornhole and now his jimmy jammy. Only one sexual organ left to destroy - el huevos. See ya in another 3 months buddy. Okay now all of you go join the eFukt forum. The dude in these videos posts on there. For realz.
Now this is a most excellent way to tear that thin piece of skin that separates the inside of the vagina from the poop shoot. Puncture that and your lady friend will be the first woman on earth to space dock herself. Wee! Sounds like eFukt material to me. Any volutneers? Click HERE to see a similar video.
That doesn't even look too fun. Her tits look like tomatoes on the verge of exploding. I never realized breasts were so durable. Not only do they come in handy for whatever the fuck you'd call this shit, but they also serve as excellent punching bags. They're multipurpose, unlike my penis.
This is from a Russian film called Philosophy Of A Knife. It's about the Japanese Unit 731... the one that pretty much spent a decade coming up with ridiculous ways to kill people. It's basically just 4 hours of torture. Fun fun fun. While we're on the subject, I'm in preproduction on a post-apocalyptic thriller about punk rock necrophiliacs. Really could use some female talent. Hit me up!
Fuck, that's a hell of a way to mop a floor. It's inspiring really. So how exactly would one apply this kind of creativity to cleaning up their bathroom? I've got shit stains on my toilet dating back from 1997 and the only way I'm gonna get off my ass and do something about it is if it involves a naked woman.
Nothing says revenge like like mixing bodily fluids into the foods of others. Think about how much spit, piss, shit and semen you've unwittingly ingested at the hands of motherfuckers like this. Processed food 4 life.
Ashley Blue gets choked out in what is supposedly her first porn shoot ever. Every Muslim across the globe will be shouting Allah Akbar as they stroke their tootsie rolls to this video. Click HERE and you'll understand why. SOURCE: MEATHOLES.