How To Open Champagne

How To Open Champagne

Uploaded 04/14/18
Related Videos

Incredible Acts, Depraved Humans 13

That first girl is something special. Her reactions may normally be mistaken for being on the wet end of a crypto rug pull or your proctologist reaching for spicy mayo instead of an authorized lubricant but trust me, this is something totally different. (Autism. It's autism.)

Incredible Acts, Depraved Humans 2

I gotta say; supreme vag on the redhead. Haven't seen a pair of lips that impressive since the time I got caught with a VHS rip of Fast Times at Ridgemont High and the last jar of Smuckers Sweet Orange Marmalade. Mother's Day hasn't been the same since.

The Pump Master

Meet Scott Taylor. Today Scott is a well respected porn mogul, but that wasn't always the case. Flashback to the glory years of 1985 and witness the Billy Mays of penis pump salesmen.

03/13/18 Mildly Retarded

The Dumbest Shit Ever Said In Porn

Belladonna is down for dog cock, Proxy Paige wants to fuck her own mom, & Annette Schwarz gets wet thinking about vomiting on senior citizens. Goodbye okcupid.com, my search for companionship has been fulfilled.

07/30/12 Favorites

The Most Beautiful Breakdown Ever

These two carpet munchers soul mates engage in dikey lesbo sex make passionate love and after cumming her brains out, she breaks into happy tears.

11/05/13 Elegant Angel Fail

U GOT WHAT IN YOUR EYE

She just turned 18 and got into porn. She never thought this would happen but luckily her co-star has some comforting words for her.

12/16/13 Bangbros Fail

Why is this Even a Thing?

Reminds me of something my grandpa used to say: Your output is only as good as your input. Not since the the trailer for Terminator Dark Fate have I been so disgusted with women over the age of 40.

06/06/19 Fail

My First Escort

Some real memorable facial expressions in this one. Almost as if she can't believe someone would pay good money to hookup with a person possessing less sexual prowess than a New York City hotdog, and still achieve climax. 4/10; would penetrate again.

Camgirl Left Speechless

Paying someone on the internet to watch you jerk off on webcam seems pathetic and sad overall, but this one has to hold back laughing when she see's this fuckin guys dick.

FORTNUT: A New Level of Cringe

What the fuck happened to April O'neil? It seems a few years ago she entered into some sort of porn studio residency and is being forced to churn out horrendous shit like this at gun point. Today's flavor? One of the few Fortnite players that doesn't have body odor reminiscent of Regal popcorn butter". POGGERS IN CHAT ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

07/04/24 Wood Rocket Fail

The Caught Compilation 10

If your social skank score is measured by the amount of times your bare ass has been caught on CCTV, I'd say these highway hoebags are sitting somewhere between "Code Orange" and "Threat to Society" Now, DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE YOU GO

Type ? for random video