How To Open Champagne

How To Open Champagne

Uploaded 04/14/18
Related Videos

The 2 Million Scoville Orgasm

Monetizing your vagina only has a few rules: Minimal trips to Home Depot, and keep the clitoris away from all things with the name "Husqvarna" on them. Not a hard list, but this MFC alumni decides to test fate another way, resulting in a semi-rage quit. GGNORE.

The Most Beautiful Breakdown Ever

These two carpet munchers soul mates engage in dikey lesbo sex make passionate love and after cumming her brains out, she breaks into happy tears.

11/05/13 Elegant Angel Fail

Nudes Via Room Service

An aryan idol sexually trolls the hotel bell hop in order to win a "contest" that may or may not even exist. Regardless, Michael Cera is here to help. Although I'm not entirely convinced he's ever done this before.

10/07/15 Amateur

Cornholin in Kentucky

A couple of yahoos get caught mashin potatoes during happy hour. Not very conspicuous about it either. Remember that one weirdo in school that always dropped his pants to the floor in front of the urinal? This is what happens when he grows up.

05/15/23 Busted!

Deaf Azn Girl

Meet Kim, the bombshell Azn who can't hear shit. Our genius porn hero guy figures to write down "me want fukky fukky" on paper and away we go. She only makes little soft vowel noises, it's pretty adorable.

The Ratchet Compilation 2022

"I'll tell ya one thing about my personal life that I've never told before. I never fucked a ten, but one night, I fucked five twos. And I think that ought to count. I think that ought to go in your record as a positive achievement." - George Carlin

12/05/22 WTF

Most Outrageous Cum Walk Of All Time

Another historical moment that will make you question inter-metropolitan travel.

08/24/26 Kink.com Exhibition

The Most Beautiful Breakdown Ever

These two carpet munchers soul mates engage in dikey lesbo sex make passionate love and after cumming her brains out, she breaks into happy tears.

11/05/13 Elegant Angel Fail

Why is this Even a Thing?

Reminds me of something my grandpa used to say: Your output is only as good as your input. Not since the the trailer for Terminator Dark Fate have I been so disgusted with women over the age of 40.

06/06/19 Fail

The Discomfort Zone

You know the deal: It's the height of the pandemic and funds are circling the drain. So you hit up the local videographers and offer your services to the highest bidder. I_CUM_HELLMANS hits up your DM's on Reddit and now the smell never washes off. GG NO RE

08/02/21 HeavyOnHotties Fail

Educating an 18-year-old Rookie

Take a culture that considers Rick and Morty comedy, crossbreed them with an addiction to street drugs and this is the result. a.k.a top tier pussy slaying material in the world of Joey-P. Don't agree? Leave feedback on [whatever the fuck he's selling on Amazon] and prove it.

10/07/21 JoePusher.com Fail
Type ? for random video