One indisputable fact of life: Crossbreeding Arnold Schwarzenegger with anything will instantly improve it in every way. Even an extraordinarily overhyped meme girl that surprisingly, hasn't made me want to pull my third ball off (yet). Here's to those 15 minutes lasting another 5. PARTS: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-]
uhhh, I don't know exactly when 'people paying me to treat my throat like a resident evil villain' became a thing. But I suspect TikTok is responsible. Seek pharmaceutical intervention as soon as possible.
There's only one reason people storyboard, shoot, edit and upload this kind of shit to the Internet. And it lives somewhere in between "I need to pay my taxes" and "$1 dollar pizza slices make me shit blood". Just three of life's little guarantees. More: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-] [-7-]
Turns out there's absolutely no shortage of individuals that consider teaching their penis the macarena a societal norm. A Superb technique no doubt, but probably not for beginners. Chances are you'll misjudge one 360 no-scope and catch a local in the crossfire. It's called "The Ben Roethlisberger" and it'll make you wish you kept the half boners at home.
Today we go on a spirited journey to a time forgotten; Behind the scenes of your average 2004 porn shoot. Special shoutout to Julian for being a role model during my college years. That man's lust for turning fallopian tubes into tier-3 tuna casserole should have earned the Martha Stewart seal of approval.
idk what these goofballs were thinking when they decided going public with these acts of treason was a good idea. Something about the return on investment seems a little fucky. Possibly a decision sponsored and brought to you by [Prime™] Energy drinks. [PART 1]
Fun Fact: Herpetophiliacs Paleontologists don't really know how big a tyrannosaurus rex's penis actually was. Estimations are somewhere between 10 inches and 12 feet.
The "Pepe le Pew" of porn finds out his costar is half an X-men with titanium rods installed on her spin. Woodman's response? An absolute fucking hurricane of verbal and physical assaulting that would make Chris Brown look like Charlie Brown lol.
Yeah uh... so is this what studio porn has evolved into? Because if I've lived to the point where people are actually spending money on producing cleverly disguised Cialis commercials we may have finally reached the bottom...
Epic poker face @ .57 mark. I call this one the 'i totally just nutted in my own mouth but i dont even give a fuck cause i have a 6.7 inch penis and listen to Rage Against The Machine on vinyl' look. Dude's got that shit mastered.
