Thats Why They Wear Those Hats

Thats Why They Wear Those Hats

Uploaded 09/19/16
Related Videos

Unacceptable Devices VI

Before you ask why the mutant at 1:05 is included, I want you to take a good long look at that weapon of mass destruction. With those dimensions you'd think his question mark lookin ass would be too busy fighting Peter Pan instead of driving the female community to abstinence.

Unacceptable Devices XIV

Everybody has a gift. For some, it's convincing solid 4's to double up on their bald headed field mice while simultaneously solving a sudoku. For others, it's knitting. But that last girl? Whoever is writing the next Final Destination movie better start taking some fucking notes.

Life of the Party

You know you had fun when the next day you wake up with a concussion and realize you not only left your phone, but you also forgot your clothes, underwear, sunglasses and self-respect at the club.

01/19/17 Public

Porn That Shouldn't Exist: 10

Another posse of preoccupied partially sentient protagonists wondering if they could but never questioning if they should. These things would have never happened if they just gave Jeff Goldblum the Oscar.

04/02/26 Amateur

Awkward Moments In Porn 13

There's a lot to digest here. But nothing is as concerning as whatever rodeo clown, double-wide uncle sister bullshit is going on around the 3:11 mark. Axe body wash isn't going to clean this feeling off me tonight. Time to dip into the disaster emergency kit.

Asian Bitch In A Drainage Ditch

This one starts out as your typical day in Okinawa, but it looks like there's a tinge of legitimate concern before the credits roll. Guess it's just another one of those unfortunate side effects from engaging with a part of the world that considers mixed martial arts a form of roleplay.

01/02/25 IPPA.JP Asians

Cumming For Strangers

Meet Melody: A 33% shareholder in the trio of Italian freaks known as DollsCult. Apparently in between marathoning episodes of Metaloclypse and getting death threats for wiping their genitals all over public property - they actively participate in community service. #getamop

09/25/20 Teen

EPIC Butt Plug FAIL

I like her face. I like her enthusiasm. But above all I like her devotion to commitment. Her borderline absent reaction to an explosive device detonating inside her spincther however, has reinforced my stance on late-term abortions. Like, 35 years late. Toss a token in the abyss via the source link.

11/27/17 Siswet19 Insertions

"I Do Porn With My Mom"

I'm no expert, but we may be reaching ultra critical levels of unforgivable shamelessness here. Or as the Italians used to call it; "Exterminus Adversus Slutterdominous". Now call your parents and tell them what you learned today.

07/07/25 Pornbox WTF

Unacceptable Devices IV

The downside to treating your asshole as a source of income? Every time you get done colonizing the dark planet, somebody comes along and insists on outdoing you. I'm talking the kind of miscreant that would mount a Brontosaurus if it meant doubling her OnlyFans subs (4:25 mark). [DISCUSS HERE]

Helping the Homeless

Our newest philanthropist has officially crossed the line into perverse territory. Not even his predecessors can claim they've pushed their love of charity this far before. Take 2 showers tonight. Just in case. [ PART I ]

02/13/23 Public
Type ? for random video