Cum Haters 2023

Cum Haters 2024

Whole lot of tomfoolery going on here. While most girls will accept the fate of the firing squad they kneel down in front of, there's always an exception. Today there will be 14 exceptions.

GIRL HAS DELAYED ORGASM

We're all too familiar with premature ejaculators, but what about latent ejaculation? Watch as Sum Dum Ho starts cumming an entire minute after intercourse is completed without even being touched. WTF?

Priceless Escort Experience

Hoe Chi Minh's first time at the fish market goes sour after realizing he should have spent the extra $20 at eros.com before dartboarding the bargain bin. Her defense for smelling like a Portuguese outhouse? LIterally nothing. She carries on like this is part of the girlfriend experience. I fucking laughed.

Ultra Alpha

Would Denmark Mafia be so kind as to turn the soundbyte at 0:24 into their next banger? That's the kind of collaboration that can fuel my beat-off sessions all the way into spring. More Woodman HERE and HERE.

Cum Haters 2023B

Browse the catalogue of Day-1 pornstars long enough and you're sure to end up finding women that treat getting hit with a couple of snowballs is akin to being put in front of a North Korean firing squad. And today my friends, there is no exception. More here.

Cum Haters 2023C

You know the drill; An assembly line of females willingly sign up for a chance at making it in the wonderful world of pornography, only to find out at the last second they wrote a check their taste buds can't cash. Emphasis on the last girl. You can scope the full(er) scene [HERE.]

Oscar-Worthy Anal

We're gonna need that statue back, Leo.

Warning: Advanced Users ONLY

11 Seconds: That's the average time it takes for one family-sized order of Chang's Orange Chicken to kick flip it's way out of my body and make it's way back to the manure farm. It's also the amount of time it takes the new poster girl for "LOLIDGAF" to get the official Efukt seal of approval. You're welcome.

Exorcism via Anal

Deep in the dungeon of KINK studios, they have accidentally unleashed a demon poltergeist from a troubled young girl. A sweet girl that finds vaginal sex super boring and only gets off from evil butt sex.

Cum Hating Pornstars

The supply of seminally apathetic women is never-ending.

INCREDIBLE: 3 Orgasms in 90 Seconds

A truly beautiful ballad about a girl that makes pterodactyl sex noises and a man that pulls off one of the most amazing sexual achievements ever filmed. I think we all wish we had a little Jimmy in us.

CAUGHT CHEATING AGAIN