Flipping the Minnow, Clubbing the Chimp, Procrastabating, Shaking Hands with Bruce Willis - Call it what you want. I refer to it as the only reason to leave the house other than to stock up on Mr. Pibb and fried dough. Shoutouts to feminism for empowering these women.
Browse the catalogue of Day-1 pornstars long enough and you're sure to end up finding women that treat getting hit with a couple of snowballs is akin to being put in front of a North Korean firing squad. And today my friends, there is no exception. More here.
Unfortunately, this video starts after her cavernous butthole swallows the oversized rubber dildo and sucks it deep into her colon. Regardless, rent is due on her Tokyo closet and the show must go on!
Perhaps this can be classified as "small wiener compensation". It happens when homebois packing less meat than a vegetarian BBQ get discouraged by their girl's complete lack of excitement. Building a device that scalps your crotch is optional. Oh... you'll see.
If this year has taught me anything at all; it's that cabin fever has driven desperate people to the edge. Especially the ones that are no stranger to Walmart gift cards and live on streets that are named after presidents. 2022 is gonna be lit ya'll.
The downside to dating a girl with the self-awareness of a TikTok investor? Literally nothing. Not even an unannounced visit to vegemite valley is enough to send her running. Either we have a cold-blooded liar on our hands, or that pudding hatch is spring-loaded.
Somewhere in the next 4 minutes you may ask yourself: What the fuck led to the creation of this? Amphetamines? Mental illness? An unhealthy addiction to masturbating with a Vitamix Explorian [2:20 mark] I don't know but... another sequel is most definitely in the works. [-PART 1-]
Before you ask why the mutant at 1:05 is included, I want you to take a good long look at that weapon of mass destruction. With those dimensions you'd think his question mark lookin ass would be too busy fighting Peter Pan instead of driving the female community to abstinence.
goblin mode; the behavior of someone who wants to feel comfortable doing whatever they want, not caring about trying to be clean, healthy, attractive or about impressing other people. [PART I]
Aim for dry ground and let 'er rip. That's been the formula for centuries... until Krystal "i have standards" Steal showed up. You see, she has more apathy for body fluids than Paula Deen has for low fat potato chippies. Ever wonder what it would be like if KFC had an all-you-can-eat buffet? That's the kind of 'sounds fun but always ends bad' disappointment I'm talking about here.
Much like Labubu popularity, one has to question why half of this bullshit even exists in the first place. Emphasis on the 1:20 mark, which somehow still hasn't gotten a Crisco sponsorship . Simply brilliant. [more]
