First attempts at delivering a beat down in meat town [1:53], a possible Resident Evil 4 cosplay [3:27] and a language barrier so ridiculous I might have to give the girl her own special section on this site in the future. [4:17] If your Tinder profile doesn't have the words butt poosy fuck on it, why even try?
Looks like someone crossbred Rosario Dawson with a howler monkey and gave it rabies. But this isn't for the lulz... more about awareness. You honestly don't even need video for this. The soundtrack alone is enough to keep my Bugle Boy cut-offs on the rinse cycle.
Imagine reaching a point in your life where fantasies just aren't doing it for you anymore, so you unleash an even deeper mental illness and create some sort of hybrid, cabbage patch fuck dance home videos and think not hiding your identity is a good idea. This is that point.
You know at one point in time her dirt tulip at full pucker was still smaller than the cock of an Eskimo in January. I want to know where that footage is. And more importantly, the followup video of John McAfee announcing her as his running mate for 2020?
Meet Luciana. aka Timea Bella. aka Indisputable Liar. She claims her stink whistle has less mileage on it than the Peloton in Ozzy Osbourne's basement, yet doesn't even call a timeout when Woody goes straight to the A. But when it comes time to sample some French vanilla, she calls it quits. Stay tuned for part 2 where I'll showcase her triumphant comeback.
For my Japanese-deficient friends, the original title of this masterpiece roughly translates to: "Nana Maeno Refrigerator Girl I Put My Step Sister In The Refrigerator And Turned Her Into A Frozen Sex Toy Nana" Do I believe more than 3% of those words? No. But honesty never got in between me and my cum sock before, and it isn't about to start now.
Contrary to appearance, leading role in the 2017 cornhole apocalypse was not her specialty. Now that she's retired, you could say her talents were more wasted than season 5 of The Walking Dead. Regrets are temporary. Mike Tyson uppercutting your sphincter in the 3rd round is forever.
A run of the mill twerking competition is won in an epic land slide when little miss hair extensions makes the guy jizz himself. For her legendary feat Shaquanda is awarded the illustrious title and like fitty bucks.
Over the course of 15 years, I've tried saving the word epic for oddities that truly work for the definition. And let me tell you friends: If an emotional beat down of a daddy-issued ketamine-lifer doesn't earn it, the 4-inch race-rampage in the final act will lol.
