knocked Herself Out

knocked Herself Out

Uploaded 04/12/15
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Seriously what the fuck is that

Skig tag? Krang from TMNT? Fuck if I know, but whatever it is... it totally rubbed up against the other dudes thigh at the 1.38 mark, causing a half chewed Bagel Bite to be ejected from my mouth and on to my Where's Waldo themed keyboard.

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Turns out there's absolutely no shortage of individuals that consider teaching their penis the macarena a societal norm. A Superb technique no doubt, but probably not for beginners. Chances are you'll misjudge one 360 no-scope and catch a local in the crossfire. It's called "The Ben Roethlisberger" and it'll make you wish you kept the half boners at home.

An Unfortunate Turn of Events

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NOTHING is Impossible

Pigs flying, A Manson Family Hanukkah special and clean underwear after all-you-can-eat Chinese food. These are all things I expected to see long before a man that has mastered the art of hands-free ejacs. Next time do it into the palm of a guy named Carlos. It's called the Puerto Rican Panhandle, I invented it.

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uhhh, I don't know exactly when 'people paying me to treat my throat like a resident evil villain' became a thing. But I suspect TikTok is responsible. Seek pharmaceutical intervention as soon as possible.

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The Absurdity of Japanese Pornography

A "last man standing" circle jerk to the death. After decades of being forced to censor genitals, Japanese smut producers have lost their minds.

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