Actually, I lied. She's nothing I'd want to fuck, nor is there legitimate contempt for her peter heater. She's raisawetsx - gifter of original content and cervical prize fighter. Moral of the story: Never underestimate a Russian's pain threshold.
Got a bunch of requests on the girl's name. And in early 2000's fashion, there's more of them than quarters in a football game. She's Michaelle aka Michelle aka Vanessa aka Victoria aka Viktoria and after [11 scenes] she hightailed it away from the BBC payroll.
Pug-faced Hispanic drinks herself so numb she doesn't even notice when last night's chimichanga is hanging halfway out her asshole. Her laugh is as bad as her hygiene. Sounds like something Steven Urkel would emit while making love to the dude from Wonder Years. Watch this one all the way through.
In the bowels of Brazil a.k.a. the other other Mexico, a local stripper gives a weary traveler an experience he'll never forget... if he can remember. He goes home with a dildo souvenir so he'll definitely know something went down that night. #YOLO
Perhaps 'audible' is the wrong word to use here, as it suggests this misfit anticipated the scene going any other possible way. She didn't. Trust me. I've been inside a Walmart parking lot on a Friday night - I know what I'm talking about.
You know at one point in time her dirt tulip at full pucker was still smaller than the cock of an Eskimo in January. I want to know where that footage is. And more importantly, the followup video of John McAfee announcing her as his running mate for 2020?
Consider this a 4 minute tutorial on why you should always stay away from those folks that consider a $50.00 Mernard's gift card a form of foreplay. Remember Norman Vincent's words: “Always shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll still land among the hepatitis."
Who the fuck comes up with these hybrid fetish flicks? Next time you producers want to get creative, how about coating a machete in Zoloft and fucking Logan Paul up the cornholio until he's smiling like Matt Damon on the cover of Good Will Hunting? Google it.
After years of being bullied about her great big ass, Guadalupe finally snapped, embraced it and now uses it as a weapon. Srsly tho, this South American girl's ass has gotta set some sort of world record. BOOOOOOOOOOOOMMM
8 examples of why having too much confidence in yourself can be a bad thing. Cringe at them. Subscribe to them if you must. But do not encourage the kind of behavior that results in more disappointments than a trailer park family reunion. The world must heal.