Retarded Moments in Porn 2023

ex·per·i·menting: [1] to try out new concepts or ways of doing things [2] performing a scientific procedure, to determine something [3] to change the entire demographic for the NERF Elite Strongarm Blaster

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First Scene, Last Scene

2002-2004. An era of professionally produced pornography that should probably be forgotten. Not a single penetration was made, yet I feel like I've been fucked by spare tires and empty cans of Busch Light after sitting through this atrocity. The line dropped at 2:30 really makes you wonder how many Marlboro Miles these guy were paid for the scene.

03/18/24 Bizarre

Real Cowboy Shit

♫18 naked cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch ♫ Big, hard, throbbing cocks wanting to be sucked ♫ 18 naked cowboys wanting to be fucked ♫ Cowboys in the showers at Ram Ranch

05/29/23 WTF

The Worst of OnlyFanz VIII

It's not even the fact that these fetishes exist. It's that some of these creaturas are banking a yearly salary after swimming through an Arby's dumpster for 3 minutes so Jungle Jack in Frogdick Mississippi can have beat off material for the week. We might not be in end times. But intermission was a long time ago.

The Show Must Go On

Playstation One-levels of animation and someones first experience with Windows Movie Maker goes horribly... right? In other words, I only ejaculated twice. And that's coming from a man whos seen Sarah Silverman naked. My voice matters.

Her First Squirt

A heart warming moment when a pretty camgirl who happens to sound like MadTV's Stuart, drops jaw and flips her shit when she unexpectedly squirts for the first time in her life.

YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG... AGAIN

Not since ejaculating to Samuel L Jackson's death scene in Deep Blue Sea have I felt this much cinematographic remorse. They just let his wonder worm flap around without even an attempt at Photoshop. Five more leading roles like this and she'll be ready for Paul Anderson.

06/03/17 Little Caprice Fail

WRONG HOLEZ: 2022

So you think Dr. Phil has covered all the bases of marital disasters? Well it's time to reevaluate bitch. These pioneers of female empowerment do it all. And by all I mean everything except give us the long awaited sequel to Karen's Krapper: Volume 27. Alexa, play Big Bottom by Spinal Tap.

10/24/22 Anal

Shit Pornstars Say 9

Between the carnivorous instructions that might actually devolve human beings and whatever the fuck ancient language was trying to leak out of the guy in the last clip, I think it's safe to say we have some form of a predicament in our education system.

The Most Pathetic Lesbian Scene Of All Time

Some women that happen to look like rejected "Lord of the Rings" characters find themselves in a cheap hotel room, making a porn movie so atrocious that even the producer wouldn't show up to film it.

Invaded, Violated and Victimized

In Pasadena no one can hear you cream. [-song-]

06/05/23 Parasited Bizarre

Cuck Has Second Thoughts

He finally decided it was time to let his wife try fucking a black dude... just once. He even films it so they can look back on this special moment. Good call because half way through he starts getting wet feet about the whole 'stranger fucking my wife' thing.

04/09/16 Cuckold
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