I Can Never Focus In A Cafe

U GOT WHAT IN YOUR EYE

She just turned 18 and got into porn. She never thought this would happen but luckily her co-star has some comforting words for her.

Anal Rookie Can't Keep Up With Friend

"I'm very sad that anal isn't as enjoyable as I want it to be."

WIFE MADE HER CHOICE

Tits and Aspergers

A 25 year old boy suffering from both severe autism and chronic virginity has found hope in backpage.com. Will he finally lose his V-card?

Prostitute Never Saw it Coming

I don't think that title and/or thumb truly convey the crossover that's about to happen here. But if it costs $50,000 to get an 8 pack of Oscar Mayer's uncured wieners into a female's dung funnel, then life is no longer worth living. Inflation did this.

Two Reichs Make A Wrong

Here it is. Three minutes of the 2nd most apprehensive plot lines that can escape the human brain during a spirited round of Billy Blanks Tae Bo 3-Pack DVD and resistance bands combo set on sale now at Amazon for Black Friday. Use promo code: BERGHOF

The Show Must Go On

Playstation One-levels of animation and someones first experience with Windows Movie Maker goes horribly... right? In other words, I only ejaculated twice. And that's coming from a man whos seen Sarah Silverman naked. My voice matters.

Whorable Fuckups

Sickening. Abhorrent. And honestly? Offensive. Now that we're done reviewing the second season of The Last Of Us, we can watch this. Emmy nominations across the board.

I Must've Been Drugged!

"XTRAXION: Miguel's Story" A tragic tale of obsession, desperation and loss. Some people just don't know when to stop. Miguel is one of those people.

Chaturbate Threesome Leads to Fight

This self-titled pimp from Arkansas goes by "Mrlongstroke2015" and today he has invited two ratchets over for a threesome show. One problem: the girls just beat him up.

Crushed Dreams Of Porn Stardom

These guys thinking they have what it takes to be porn stars makes as much sense as the story line for "Sharknado".

The Third Eye

Anybody have the technical name for this phenomenon? or a real explanation? Specifically one that doesn't involve voodoo dolls, Penn & Teller or Planet Wing's suicide sauce. I want answers.