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No Bitch I Aint Eating Your Pussy

She tries to blame the fowl taste on the lube but that doesn't really explain the cheese whiz dripping out of her pussy. Douche with hydrogen peroxide + Mentos and get on with the show.

10/11/08 Fail

Good Porn Ruined By Shitty Music

It's a porno, not a god damn fitness video. Stop adding in the shitty keyboard-generated dance music, it drains out the sound of the woman crying and gagging on cock, which is an essential part of my fap session.

10/06/08 LULZ

I Wanna Be A Pornstar

A few tit jobs and a little lipo, and then BAM... her vagina will be generating 7 figures annually before you even know it. It'll also be generating a yellowish discharge, depending on the severity of the Herpes and Gonorrhea that she's bound to contract.

10/04/08 Modifications

Chef Boyardee Jizzes Upon Contact

Poor bastard, he's the real life version of the premature ejaculator from American Pie. I'd like to see him masturbate. All he has to do is poke his cock with his index finger and it's a done deal.

09/25/08 Premature

Nudist Has A Vaginal Problem

It's typical really. Nudists are all about being natural... leave the genitals exposed, armpits unshaven and when you've got a yeast infection... you let it rain.

09/24/08 Bizarre

Youre Doing It Wrong

Wrong hole? No not quite. More like wrong fucking direction. His cock nearly pierces through the piece of skin seperating her ass from her pussy. Remember the 'chestburster' scene from Alien? Just watch...

09/15/08 Bizarre

Oh Noes The Condom Broke!

I found this on some website that pays $2,000 for homemade porno. I'm kinda bummed... they rejected all 3 of my personal sextapes, citing that my 2 inch penis wouldn't appeal to general audiences. Ouch!

Pornstar Ruins Her Boob Job

Silicone is gonna start leaking out her nipples and in 3 days she'll be back to an A cup. I think that makes this the cheapest breast reduction surgery ever.

08/19/08 Fail

They LOL At His 1 Inch Penis

This video mad me LOL hard.

08/15/08 LULZ

Newbie Ruins A Porno Shoot

This guy genuinely thought that eating your own semen was socially acceptable. In France, yeah maybe. But in the rest of the world, no, people tend to frown upon the act of ingesting your own cum. Sorry!

Bitch You Got A Yeast Infection

This is probably why you don't see that many male performers bragging about their profession... cause they all got warts on their dicks and have to eat out girls like this! Yum yums.

08/04/08 Fail

A Good Reason Not To Do Anal

I know I know, all I ever do is boast about the greatness of anal sex. But we must not disregard a major downside to packing fudge - and that would be the fact that getting shit all over your cock is inevitable.

Pissed Off Crackwhore

She's coked out and on the rag. If that isn't an invitation for AIDS I don't know what is. Luckily this skank got kicked off the set before anyone had a chance to stick their dick in festering pussy hole.

Ouch Her Pussy Hurts

Big penises can be dangerous. Better be careful or they'll poke your eye out.. and maybe your cervix too.

07/27/08 Fail

She Cant Feel His Small Dick

His snaggled toothed girlfriend can barely feel his cock so she keeps asking for it harder but she doesn't seem to realize that there is only so much you can do with 3 inches..

07/21/08 Amateur

Hooker Refuses To Get Off Her Phone

Easy solution: grab the phone & shove it up her twat. With that hole being occupied, you'll have no choice but to relocate your penis to the nearest available orifice - her anus. I call this "How To Get Anal From A Prostitute Without Paying Extra, by eFukt.com".

07/21/08 Amateur

Caught Cheating By Angry Husband

From what I've read there is a longer version of this floating around somewhere. If any of you have it - hit me up! I have a sneaking suspicion that someone ends up getting their ass kicked.

07/20/08 Busted!

Mean Sluts Ridicule Noob

This video really hits close to home. I too was once ridiculed for bustin my sloppy goo nuts prematurely. My ego was scarred and so was my penis (herpes). Watching this brings it all back. So to the Hispanic slut who was the most vocal during the humiliation: Space Dock, Strawberry Cheesecake, and a Tony Danza. All for you. All at once.

She Finds The Hidden Camera

No no you're doing it all wrong. You gotta hide the camera in a black t-shirt with the lens poking out through one of the arm holes and be sure to use some black tape to cover up the red LED light. Mom will never notice! hah

07/13/08 Voyeur

You Suck At Fucking My Wife

This guy propositioned a black man to fuck his wife, hoping to satisfy her desires for a huge cock. The black man gladly agrees but later discovers that fulfilling his role isn't as easy as he had anticipated.

07/04/08 Fail
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