My Dead Sugar Daddy Made Me Millions

Shy, Scared & Fucking Beautiful

Hot chicks + social anxiety. It's a phenomenal combination, second only to Mr. Pibb w/ Koala Yummies. Add a degree of sexual inexperience into the mix and you got yourself GF material, provided that they don't first end up in porn like this tard.

Awkward Asian Fellates 10 Dicks

I've never seen someone so happy to get gang banged in the mouth...but I guess anything beats being back home making soccer balls in the rice fields.

The Special Needs Prostitute

Blue-balled midgets, schizophrenic autists, Miley Cyrus' fan base... this woman's sexual clientele is more well-rounded than IHOP's farmhouse breakfast. Unfortunately there's no visuals of penetration. But what it lacks in nightmares... it makes up for in California's voting pool.

First Scene, Last Scene

2002-2004. An era of professionally produced pornography that should probably be forgotten. Not a single penetration was made, yet I feel like I've been fucked by spare tires and empty cans of Busch Light after sitting through this atrocity. The line dropped at 2:30 really makes you wonder how many Marlboro Miles these guy were paid for the scene.

The Biggest Whore In History

For a hooker/pornstar, she honestly seems like one of the nicest people ever. Even if her butthole looks like the queen alien from "Starship Troopers" and possibly carries multiple strains of the same venereal diseases.

Teacher Of The Millennium

She's junior college educated, has a rack to premature ejaculate for, and isn't afraid to slob on the knob after her partner takes a trip to cornhole city. Superintendent Jackoff & Co can hate all they want, this angel is a keeper. Read the story HERE. See her nastiest videos in the source.

Cursed Cumshots

Is this still considered pornography? Or something that gets submitted to a performative art school as a final project? Because if you're waxin carrot to shit like this, it might be is definitely time for intervention.

Hooker of the Year 2019

Poor prosti gets sandbagged by a local gentleman who's only sexual experience involves Walmart's checkout line & Colt 45. But apparently her dugout is built for the major leagues, cause despite his John McLane ingenuity... she still walks away with a smile. Fucking amazing.

Buy A Daughter, Get the Mom Free

It's pretty unbelievable what kind of deals still exist if you're willing to put in the work and find them. No need to negotiate on price either. Just lay down your $27USD and let the all you can eat vaginitis begin.

THEY JUST WATCHED?

Energy Drinks and Alien Sex

A caffeine addicted, amateur paranormal scientist returns home after an experiment to make contact with beings outside of earth has presumably failed.

Awkward Guy Ruins Porn Shoot

A socially inept goober gets a job getting jerked off by a hottie and manages to fuck it up, dashing his dreams of porn stardom in the process. It's like the movie Rudy, if Rudy was thrown out the game before ever playing and never scored.