Spitters and Quitters 2

Unacceptable Devices

Consider this a 4 minute tutorial on why you should always stay away from those folks that consider a $50.00 Mernard's gift card a form of foreplay. Remember Norman Vincent's words: “Always shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll still land among the hepatitis."

Cum Haters 2023B

Browse the catalogue of Day-1 pornstars long enough and you're sure to end up finding women that treat getting hit with a couple of snowballs is akin to being put in front of a North Korean firing squad. And today my friends, there is no exception. More here.

How to Get Banned from the Military

Leaking classified information? Mumbling incoherent rants about setting third world countries on fire? Shit, even International Dick Cricket Infestation would have appeared on my list sooner than 1 Tinder gremlin subjecting herself to 31 separate 8-man gangbangs in the fucking barracks. Yet... here we are.

Cum Haters 2024

Whole lot of tomfoolery going on here. While most girls will accept the fate of the firing squad they kneel down in front of, there's always an exception. Today there will be 14 exceptions.

Pornstar Accidently Pukes on Fellow Actress

The pharyngeal reflex AKA laryngeal spasm AKA gag reflex exists to prevent us from dying, but it also makes it much harder to shove dicks down our throats.

Cum Haters 2023C

You know the drill; An assembly line of females willingly sign up for a chance at making it in the wonderful world of pornography, only to find out at the last second they wrote a check their taste buds can't cash. Emphasis on the last girl. You can scope the full(er) scene [HERE.]

Cum Haters Anonymous 5

Do I even need to release a service bulletin at this point? Ladies; Next time you feel like exploring your options, put in about 18 seconds of research and mAniFeSt what you're about to get into. Maybe then you'll discover something you all lack - coherence motherfuckers.

THE FRIENDSHIP IS OVER

Safe Sex FAIL

Gloryhole rookie "Emma" unequivocally accepts defeat after Stewart's Magnum XL ventures into deeper waters. In other words: The flex went wrong HAHA

The Worst of OnlyFanz IX

Today's episode isn't about the money. It's about sending a message. Specifically to the derelicts that have used the Riemann hypothesis and Swinnerton-Dyer conjecture to justify paying for what you're about to see: Stop it. Get some help.

Cum Hating Pornstars

The supply of seminally apathetic women is never-ending.

The Absolute Worst of Pornhub IV

At this point I'm not even questioning human behavior. The only thing separating all of us from being narrated by David Attenborough, are complicated sneakers and semi-automatic weapons. Turns out the Internet may have been a mistake after all. Parts: [1] [2] [3]