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And Not 1 Fuck Was Given

And Not 1 Fuck Was Given

I've never seen a woman so content with a) being butt-naked in Walmart and b) getting caught in said petri dish with her fruit of the looms on the floor. Her concern has the runtime of a Skittles commercial, and all she can do is giggle like Charlie Sheen in a Botswana whorehouse.

67,621 07.24.16 DP Public
Making New Friends FAIL

Making New Friends FAIL

Exhibitionist couple get increasingly annoyed after being spotted by a deviant with the social skills of a closet Anime collector. It's akin to casting Clint Eastwood on an Iron Chef episode about anti-Semitic meatloaf recipes. Some things you just can't pull off, no matter how big your dick is.

337,976 07.15.16 Twist Fail
ORGASM OVERLOAD

ORGASM OVERLOAD

This is called 'if i act like i'm having an aneurysm, i'll make more money' syndrome. It happens when girls see a drop in token gratuity so they set their vibrators to 11 and let the brain damage begin. But today, a breaking point was reached LOL.

391,552 07.06.16 Anonymous Camwhores
Pizza Guy Goes For the Clit

Pizza Guy Goes For the Clit

It's all shits and tips until you get a 40-year-old Little Ceaser's employee a colossal erection. He was offered a peek, he went for the soggy box instead. Some label him a sexual predator - I prefer the moniker "pick up artist".

397,192 06.28.16 Anonymous Pizza
Girlfriend today, Wife tomorrow

Girlfriend today, Wife tomorrow

Esophogous mericlessly smashed at the hands of someone channeling their inner Nacho Vidal. Likely won't be able to eat solids for a week. No, this isn't my review of Holly Holm/Misha Tate. It's webster's officially definition of a 'mother fuckin KEEPER'.

136,506 06.25.16 DP
cRaZy whore is cRaZy

cRaZy whore is cRaZy

What weighs 325 pounds, has hair worse than Phil Spector, and secretly enjoys getting karate-kicked in the appendix while ripping ass? This chick's 798th fuck buddy, and he's not even the worst of the bunch. Intro track is called We Will Survive. Download all videos HERE.

3,910,810 08.24.12 admin LULZ
Seriously what the fuck is that

Seriously what the fuck is that

Skig tag? Tumor? Krang from TMNT? Fuck if I know, but whatever it is... it totally rubbed up against the other dudes thigh at the 1.38 mark, causing a half chewed Bagel Bite to be ejected from my mouth and on to my Where's Waldo themed keyboard. Song available HERE.

3,505,590 08.19.12 Kelly LULZ
78 Percent Of His Sexual Partners Quit

78 Percent Of His Sexual Partners Quit

This is legendary pipe layer Big Red, most notable for his 7 inch penis and it's not-so-cervix-friendly curvature. The end result tends to involve women screaming louder than Warwick Davis after the release of box office figures on Leprechaun 4: In Space. MORE HERE.

6,590,782 08.15.12 admin LULZ
Broken Dreams, Broken Buttholes

Broken Dreams, Broken Buttholes

Compliments aren't my strong point, but I must say... chick in the yellow dress is fucking stunning. I'd readily eat Honey Nut Cherrios out of Philip Seymour Hoffman's crusty asshole just for a chance to hold her hand. Someone Russian please hook it up. FULL VIDEO HERE.

4,768,864 08.03.12 TG LULZ
The Dumbest Shit Ever Said In Porn

The Dumbest Shit Ever Said In Porn

Belladonna is down for dog cock, Proxy Paige wants to fuck her own mom, & Annette Schwarz gets wet thinking about vomiting on senior citizens. Goodbye okcupid.com, my search for companionship has been fulfilled. SOURCES: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9.

3,709,032 07.30.12 Joe Jackson LULZ
How Is This Even Possible

How Is This Even Possible

Heads up kids, this one's gonna blow your fuckin yamaka away. It involves gummy bears, Rocky-inspired butthole punching, and an Alien 1 chest-burster reenactment so brutal you just might soil your Fruit of the Loom's. DOWNLOAD FULL VIDEO HERE.

6,786,939 07.23.12 KMB Fisting
Rejected... LIKE A BOSS

Rejected... LIKE A BOSS

Dude gets mega blue-balled after his water-buffalo of a girlfriend bails on him mid-coitus, leaving him and his lukewarm boner on a curb in downtown Newcastle. He deals with rejection the same way I dealt with the intro to season 2 of Sabrina, the Teenage Witch..... FAP.

3,346,648 07.19.12 Mathew Busted!
Wait For It...

Wait For It...

5,357,771 07.04.12 DamagedDolly Gallery
The Trolling Of Wannabe Pornstars 3

The Trolling Of Wannabe Pornstars 3

Whores from all walks of life trek to New Jersey for some quick cash and a blistering reality check. This guy does to self-confidence as Panda Express Shanghai Beef does to my asshole: obliteration. Meet the mastermind behind it all HERE. [Parts: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 ] + HERE.

4,479,327 07.02.12 Deven LULZ
The Milf From Mars

The Milf From Mars

Bittersweet painal, obscenity-filled ogasms, and a boob job pre-dating the birth of jesus. This ones got it all, and Ms. Big Ole Leathery Funbags earns some serious bonus points at the 2:35 mark.. Not even a fuckin rectal injury can dull her desire for ATM. FULL 40 MINUTE VIDEO HERE.

3,638,834 06.25.12 Creepy Clay Mildly Retarded
Girl Drops Deuce, Forgets To Wipe

Girl Drops Deuce, Forgets To Wipe

Her ability to wipe her ass is on par with Tom Sizemore's ability to not beat women. Fortunately at least 1 person in this vid has some considerable talent, and that's the dude that miraculously didn't peel over & die after getting a whiff of her shit-box! Song HERE. Full video HERE.

3,098,338 06.19.12 TG LULZ
Bath Salts = INSANE SEX

Bath Salts = INSANE SEX

This is essentially a hybrid of THIS video + THIS video, or in more comprehensive terms: 3 parts female empowerment, 141 parts bat-shit fucking retarded. ENJOY. Full video HERE.

4,499,132 06.12.12 Dissonance LULZ
The Return Of 'Gentle Breakdown' Girl

The Return Of 'Gentle Breakdown' Girl

Remember the frigid chick that randomly started sobbing in the middle of a Rocco shoot? It was actually pretty touching, to both my heart & my penis. But apparently that encounter was only chapter 1 in a saga of piss-poor decisions. Song HERE + breakdown HERE + profile HERE.

3,808,132 06.04.12 admin LULZ
EPIC ASS IS EPIC

EPIC ASS IS EPIC

Undoubtedly the most erotic thing I've seen since the time my 19 y/o housekeeper cried 'no es bueno' after happening upon my unflushed shitter. Day before was Olive Garden night, fuckin Tour Of Italy. To quote Lil Wayne - I made it rain. DOWNLOAD THE FULL VIDEO HERE.

4,468,811 05.24.12 admin Prolapse
A Different Type Of Breakdown

A Different Type Of Breakdown

Farted on, finger raped, told he looks like fuckin Robin Williams - this dude endures pain you can't even imagine. Fortunately he's a Sum 41 mosh pit survivor and holds a blackbelt in making Terminator-esque sound effects whilst flailing his arms like a fucking idiot, so it's all good. Full video HERE.

3,588,317 05.21.12 admin LULZ
She Fucks Moolionairs

She Fucks Moolionairs

Fangirl shits pinecones after overhearing pornstar Brian Pumper refer to her as a 'bitch'. Blows are exchanged & shit gets ugly, but the real battle is all verbal, with ego-busting insults like "u think i wud tweet about u? I FUCK MOOLIONAIRES NIGGUH". Fucking brutal. Source be here.

2,363,153 05.15.12 TG LULZ
Creme Fraiche'd

Creme Fraiche'd

Epic poker face @ .57 mark. I call this one the 'i totally just nutted in my own mouth but i dont even give a fuck cause i have a 6.7 inch penis and listen to Rage Against The Machine on vinyl' look. Dude's got that shit mastered. Download the full video HERE. Douchebag song HERE.

3,557,587 05.11.12 TG Porn Bloopers
You Want To Quit... FOR REALZ

You Want To Quit... FOR REALZ

B-hole brutally wrecked at the hands of some Italians, likely won't be able to walk straight for a week. No, this isn't my review for the new Parmesan Crusted Steak @ Olive Garden. This is the infamous Rocco vs. Roxy Jezel scene, and you should watch the uncut version HERE.

4,077,868 05.07.12 admin Painal
13 Most Ridiculous Orgasms Ever

13 Most Ridiculous Orgasms Ever

First time squirters, prolapse-induced climaxes and bittersweet hategasms... today's vid has more variety than a fuckin Sizzler salad bar. Best comes last, so I recommend you see this one all the way through. SOURCES: #1, #2, #3, #4, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, #12.

8,086,501 05.02.12 Gunz Orgasms
Bro Shits Himself After Knocking Girl Out

Bro Shits Himself After Knocking Girl Out

Too lazy to write something funneh, but trust me faggot, this video is top shelf. DOWNLOAD FULL VIDEO HERE.

4,372,431 04.26.12 Mia Skywalker Porn Bloopers